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K-State Loses in the First Round, Finally Accept Their Team Just Sucks


All hope for KSU fans having a decent basketball team ended when they had their ass kicked by Cincinnatti  on Friday. The Black Sheep has since spoken to a few disappointed fans.

“It’s hard to believe that we’re already out of the running,” said KSU sophomore, Brian Davis, as he tried to catch his breath from storming the court in a fit of rage. “I mean, we’ve built up our team consistently by yelling ‘fuck KU,’ at every game. Is that not enough for them?”

Cincinnati  beat KSU in the first round with a final score of 61-75. One fan is slowly coming to terms with the fact that their team just plain sucks.

“You know, maybe it’s not the poor officiating, or the lack of ‘fuck KU’ chants that did it. I mean, what if maybe our team just… sucks?” said KSU alum, Rodney Smith, in between chanting ‘fuck KU’ and hitting on his cousin.

It’s almost as if KSU’s basketball team is shittier than their town, and that’s a shock in itself.

“Manhattan smells like shit and our basketball team is shit. There’s really no winning when you go to KSU,” said Smith.

Some fans are trying to hold onto hope for football season, but those that are more realistic know better.

“We’re the worst at basketball, there’s no denying that. But for those excited for football season, come on. We’re not even that great at football,” Davis said. “We just brag about it because we’re better than Kansas. But honestly, who isn’t better than Kansas in football?”

While KSU fans mourn over their loss, KU and Wichita State fans celebrate moving on in the tournament.

Although they may have lost on the court, KSU fans can find solace in the fact that they place first when it comes to the shittiest university in Kansas.


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