Do you need some new selfies for your Tinder profile? Or maybe your Christian Mingle or farmersonly.com profile? Or better yet, a new headshot for your LinkedIn page? If any of these apply to you, or if you just need some new selfies to drop on your crush’s timeline, stay tuned to find out the best bathrooms to snap those mirror selfies at UMD!
6.) The Ed St. John Building— Best Lighting:
There is no better bathroom to snatch your angles than the one in Ed St. John. Under the bright white fluorescent lights, you might be able to hide those eye bags, your greasy hair, and crappy skin from all the stress of midterm season. Ed St. John can really take you from underdressed and overslept to a solid 6/10 on any given day.
5.). Tydings— For Size & Inspiration:
Tydings not only wins for the largest mirror in a UMD bathroom, but it also contains the most uplifting mirror on campus. Featuring a handwritten sticker that says “you’re beautiful,” this mirror will immediately transform you into Barstool’s next smoke show, almost like the magic mirror from Snow White. Hell, this mirror might even be your fairy godmother. And it’s fucking huge. So, grab all your homies and head to Tydings for some beautiful selfie time.
4.) Eppley— Gym Selfies…duh:
Eppley’s gotta make the list, obviously. Throw on your sportiest attire and head to the upstairs bathroom in Eppley to snap some thirsty gym rat pics that’ll scream, “I didn’t binge eat a box of Oreos before this” to all your Tinder matches. They don’t have to know that you’ve never actually been to the gym before this day. That’s something to save for date number 5 or later.
3.) McKeldin 2nd Floor— Will Hide Your Tears:
If you’re going for a more studious vibe, try out the second-floor bathrooms in McKeldin. The lighting is just dim enough to highlight your best facial features while also hiding your tear-stained cheeks from that Elms notification you just got. Yikes. But the good news is that selfie-ing at McKeldin will show potential employers that your studies always come first, except on Turf Tuesdays.
2.) H.J. Patterson— Privacy and Aesthetic:
First of all, no one is ever in the bathroom at H.J. Patterson. You could have a whole fricken photo shoot of yourself in there without worrying someone is gonna walk in and think you’re a conceited jerk. Also, the sparkly countertops and beautiful backsplash will contrast perfectly with whatever groutfit you decided to wear today, combining to create the most aesthetically-pleasing selfie to ever be dropped on your crush’s timeline.
1.) Any Dorm Building— For Those Full-Body Shots:
Pretty much any given dorm building at UMD possesses one, if not multiple full-length mirrors. These are great if you’re maybe not having the best face day and want to highlight some of your better features if you catch our drift. These mirrors are also a perfect way to showcase that you aren’t a loser with absolutely 0 friends, and that you might not wear sweatpants to class every day. Maybe every other day.
So grab an unsuspecting passerby to be featured in your selfies (since you really don’t have any friends), and put on something other than that giant T-shirt you’ve been sleeping in. It’s selfie time.
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