Revealed just last week, this wax replica of Coach Tom Izzo has already begun to make waves within the basketball community, and the Hall of Famer himself has even said that it gives him the creeps. We can’t blame him; it only looks like Coach if you know who it’s supposed to be. Because we think the replica could be anybody, here are our top 10 candidates for the real inspiration behind this new figure.
10.) Dustin Hoffman:
Before he was an Academy Award winner, he was assisting Jud Heathcote in going to a national championship… yeah, no. There’s just something about a big nose and squinting eyes that will make almost anyone with similar characteristics be a potential doppelganger to the Not Izzo statue.
9.) Ian McKellen:
Picture this: there’s two seconds left in the game, and Tum Tum has the ball at the top of the key. We all want him to shoot before time expires, but we all know he’s not about that life. He glances to the sideline one last time, looking for a buyout to avoid scoring responsibilities and there is our hero, Coach Izzo, screaming back at him, “You shall not pass!” Wow, that was a stretch.
8.) Elmer Fudd:
It’th wolverine huntin theathon.
7.) Seinfeld-Era Bryan Cranston:
Good ol’ Dr. Tim Whatley. Like Tim, Coach Izzo could also probably knock your teeth out, “you anti-dentite bastard.” The difference is that Izzo would only do this if the other team pussied out and tried to play zone.
Like, zoinks, Kenny Goins can shoot threes now, Scoob!
5.) Stock Photo Grandpa:
Coach Izzo is a man of many expressions, and Stock Photo Grandpa was definitely an inspiration for his waxy replica.
4.) Geno Auriemma:
If you’re well-versed in the basketball world, then you probably thought the new figure was a replica of 11x National Champion and UConn women’s basketball coach, Geno Auriemma. All jokes aside, we swear this is who the statue is really based on.
3.) Sideshow Bob:
If you imagine Bart Simpson is Matt McQuaid, then this makes perfect sense. We also like to believe that whenever Coach Izzo isn’t hoarse, he sounds like Kelsey Grammer.
2.) The Mask from Jim Carrey’s The Mask:
Believe us when we say this mask has more life in its eyes than that damn wax replica does.
1.) Crying Jordan Meme:
How appropriate. Look at the squinted eyes, the curved chin, wide forehead, thin lips, and slightly tilted eyebrows, features that make this top-tier meme the true inspiration for the new Not-Izzo statue. Beyond the facial details, both Jordan and Izzo’s induction into the Hall of Fame and impact on the sport and youth as a whole make this comparison especially uncanny. No wonder Coach is so creeped out by it.
No matter who you think the replica looks like, there’s one thing we all know for certain: its curse is what cost us to lose the last few games.