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6 Pleasant Limericks That Describe the Essence of Your East Lansing St. Paddy’s Day


Ah, limericks. The perfect way to capture the essence of your St. Paddy’s day. We slapped together some things resembling limericks for you to read while you fondly look back on East Lansing’s favorite holiday. Hopefully they’ll be enough to cure the biggest hangover of your life.


I hope no one can tell how utterly fucked up I am
In this post on my Instagram
Pretty soon I’ll be shitting green
I just hope Chad from XYZ doesn’t see the stains on my jeans
Either way I have great material for my Finstagram


We were beyond schwasted this Saint Patrick’s Day
All we could muster up the strength to do was puke, rally, and pray
We blacked out at the pregame and didn’t make it to the darty
I’ll pray to you, Patron Saint Sparty
Because round one was only child’s play



Green beer green beer green beer
Who the fuck do you know here?
“Hey Chad! This girl says she matched with you on tinder!”
Oh no! Drunken sex with a frat boy leprechaun needs  to be hindered
Green beer green beer green beer
Who the fuck do you know here?


The line for Rick’s is five miles long
I hope this leprechaun doesn’t flash me his dong
Everyone here is wearing the exact same shirt
Ah fuck, I’m losing momentum and my feet are starting to hurt
Let us inside, we’re freezing and earlier I lost at beer pong!


When you think about it, green beer is sick
It’s just food coloring so calm your tits
But alas, we chugged that shit all day
Green poop, green puke, that’s the Spartan way
Alas, it burns like a bitch


Lassies and laddies passed out on the lawn
Listening to that one Dropkick Murphy’s song from dusk ’til dawn
Your fake beard itches, your Mardi Gras beads have broken
Somewhere in Dublin, your roommate is pukin’ and chokin’
By 11 p.m. you’re hungover and call an Uber while you yawn


Hopefully these limericks brought back some fond, green-dyed memories for you. We hope you’re recovering well. Rest up Spartans, and start preparing to  do it all again next year!


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