Tragedy hit Michigan State on Tuesday after the announcement that that one band that plays that one song you heard on the radio that one time won’t be able to make it for the UAB’s Spring Concert on Thursday, April 19th. Though the four students who actually paid to see Passion Pit will be disappointed, the rest of us rejoice as Michigan State reveals the list of potential acts that may replace the indie electronica band.
Only nerds use actual instruments! Electronica? Please! All we need is a kid that can beat box, some harmony, and we’re good to go! RCAHpella can usually be found at the UAB’s Open Mic Night (because they can’t find an actual venue), but – as the desperation is sinking in- the UAB is highly considering booking the group for the upcoming concert.
6.) All Time Low…again:
Apparently All Time Low isn’t getting much business nowadays. The UAB representatives found the band stumbling down Grand River and they guaranteed they would do as many shows as Michigan State required, even if it means abandoning their tour.
5.) An Apple iPod Nano playing “Victory for MSU” on a loop:
Why take a walk when you could listen to your fight song? Fortunately, it’s the only song the UAB purchased from the iTunes Store, so it is possible that the university organization may just connect their 2nd Gen. iPod Nano to the matching speakers and have it on replay for two hours or so.
4.) College of Ed’s Against School Violence:
The Michigan State College of Education prides itself on its fabulous collaboration of educators. On occasion, however, this group decides to tap into their wild side and unleash Against School Violence (a group previously known as School Violence). With Dean Floden on drums, how could anyone pass up an act like this?
3.) Mason Ramsey:
We know. We’re tired of the yodeling Wal-Mart kid, too. But who said the UAB actually cared about who we liked listening to? He’s just about on par with Passion Pit. The only difference is you could see Passion Pit and Mason at Coachella. You can’t see Passion Pit at the Grand Ole Opry!
2.) Cassius Winston, but he only sings the chorus to “XO TOUR Llif3”:
All my friends are dead…
1.) John Engler’s Tom Jones tribute band:
It’s not unusual…is it? Interim President John Engler is very vocal about his love for Tom Jones. In fact, he’s such a fanboy that he can be found with a fake black afro, a half-buttoned shirt, and some high-waisted pleather pants singing “What’s New Pussycat?” before every meeting with the Board of Trustees to calm his nerves. After years of practice, he’s ready to let unveil his pipes to the public.
Although these options may not be top-notch, at least they’re not Passion Pit. Thanks, UAB!
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