Everyone who has ever had a group project knows the drill— go over the assignment, divide and conquer, bicker, someone forgets to do their part, fail, cry. But every group project member is the absolute worst in their own way, like these folks:
7). The Ghost:
This is the group member you saw once at the beginning of the semester, and haven’t seen since, so you assumed they dropped the class. Much to your surprise, the stumble into Berkey on the day of the presentation and ask what you need help with, and then have the nerve to seem indignant when you explain that the work is already done.
6). The Dropper:
This is the group member who actually did drop the class, shortly after agreeing to do a large portion of the project, naturally. Better yet, they didn’t tell you they dropped the class until shortly before the project was due (and even then, it’s only because you ran into them at Rick’s), so everyone had to scramble to pick up the Dropper’s slack.
5). The Try-Hard:
This is the group member that organizes group meet-ups at Club Lib and delegates tasks throughout the group. You work on your portion of the project, only to ultimately have the Try-Hard do the whole thing themselves anyway. On top of this, you later get to hear the Try-Hard complain to the professor about how they did all the work— which they may have, but only because they rejected your work in a heartbeat.
4). The Hot Mess:
One of the most attractive humans you have ever met, but man, do you wish you did not have a project with them. The Hot Mess will stumble into class 20 minutes late and shoeless, spilling a fresh Wells Starbucks coffee on themselves, and then tell you all about their disaster of a personal life, all while make grand promises about their role in the project. You know the Hot Mess is the least reliable person in the room, but with silky hair and the arms of a god, you don’t really mind.
3). The Ryan Lochte:
This liar regularly attends group meetings, and contributes to everything a little, but when the time comes for peer evaluation, the Lochte greatly exaggerates the amount work they put in. In fact, sometimes the Lochte completely fabricates a tale about villainous group mates and proceeds to take credit for the entire project, leaving your IAH group dumbfounded.
2). The Presenter:
The Presenter is one of the most notorious group project offenders. This delightful human tells you right at the beginning of the project that they are too busy with their Breslin ushering job and 15 credits to do any of the grunt work, so they will participate by presenting. Because reading off slides for 20 minuets is clearly equal work to composing and researching the information on said slides.
1). The Trump:
We’ve all experienced working with a classic Trump. Despite the many emails and texts proving that he or she did in fact say that they would do this part of the project, when push comes to shove, the Trump insists that he “never said that.” If you’re lucky, the Trump will also shout “wrong” repeatedly over you as you try and come up with ideas.
From the Try-Hard to the Trump, group project members will plague your college existence till the day you walk across the stage at graduation. But hey, if you can’t beat ‘em, join ‘em. Which of the seven are you?
Ever need a reason to skip class? Think again: