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Brainwashed By ‘Hail To The Victors’ MDen Employees Set Up Shrine To Random Dude Named Victor

MDen is under investigation while employees wait to stand trial after local Ann Arbor man, Victor Wozniak, reported to police that he was being stalked.

Victor stated he first realized he was being followed around the beginning of September when he found photos of himself photoshopped as a baby in the arms of the Virgin Mary. He became extremely suspicious when he went to the MDen later that week to pick up his season ticket holder shirt, walked in, and all employees bowed down to him, chanting ‘Hail to the Victors’.

Police launched an investigation in correspondence with psychologists revealing that the 10-hour loop of ‘Hail to the Victors’ in fact brainwashed the employees over their shifts, persuading them to become infatuated with the local man.

At press time, OSHA was meeting with the MDen and the groups were rumored to have settled on playing the song at a higher frequency to maintain spirit and hopefully releasing employees from their obsession.

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