People watching is a wonderful hobby. Have you ever been in the MU Student Center and just happened to come across a guy in the corner really diggin’ for gold thinking no one’s watching? Take a video of that shit, he deserves it. But what you don’t think about is that there’s someone out there watching you watch this guy. That’s why we came up with the best places to lurk all day for some Mizzou people watching.
6.) The top of a column:
You may be thinking, that’s a little unsafe right? Wrong. Sitting on top of that column is the best place, a nice bird’s eye view of all the people trying to hide the fact that they’re picking their nose. Just think of yourself as J. Cole sitting on top of that house in the Forest Hills Drive album cover.
“Uh… duh Sally.” But like, people go to Stank to actually be active and they just happen to people watch. Be bold, go out there with your meal and sit on the track for hours and get your fill. It’s probably better than whatever show is on ABC.
4.) A bathroom stall:
The bathroom is a wonderful place to watch some people. You’re probably thinking, “Sitting in the stall? What? That’s like, super gross…and how?” Through the crack between the door and the wall of the stall. Don’t act like you’ve never done that, you’re probably in the bathroom doing it right now.
The commuting buses are some of the best places to lurk and pretend you’re looking out the window but actually staring into the soul of the person across from you. This is the place where true emotions reveal themselves, they think they are safe… bitch, you thought wrong. You can see who really hates their life… the one with their headphones in and their head up against the window. The best is the person looking out the window as if they’re in a music video, y’all have done that one too, don’t lie.
Ellis isn’t just for studying! If you choose to sit in the middle of the room, you are in a very vulnerable state and you better not do anything to embarrass yourself. Better make sure you are looking r i g h t the day you choose to make yourself the target of stares. The person sitting next to you made the mistake of glancing over while you are having a fight with your S.O. in iMessage on your mac, and shit, they might as well heat up some popcorn because it could get bad.
1.) Through the window of your dorm:
If you are in the perfect position to see the sidewalk, you are in people watching heaven, you can see everyone but no one can see you. You’re like a god. You get to take all the snaps you want of the girl dressed like she just came out of a trailer park, and no one will catch you doing it!
Next time you’re out and about, look up and check the windows of dorms to see if you can find anyone lurkin’ around. Next time you’re in the bathroom standing at the mirror, slowly maneuver in a way so you can catch that mother fucker staring at you from the stall crack.