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5 Ways We Can Convince Michael Porter Jr. to Stay Another Year

Two minutes: So far that’s all we have gotten from Michael Porter Jr. Needless to say, this isn’t quite what everyone was expecting when MPJ committed to The Zou. Sure, he could decide to leave when the season is over and take some boring NBA job and never play for Mizzou again. The Black Sheep have come up with just a few of the reasons why staying another year is so much better than making millions of dollars and going pro.

5.) Shakespeare’s doesn’t deliver to most NBA cities:
You really think they got a Mort’s or Shakespeares at whatever city ends up drafting you? No, Michael! But look, here in Columbia, we got both them places. Not only that, but you think the restaurants in those big cities take swipes from your student I.D? You better like paying for food with cash, because your student I.D won’t do shit in Sacramento or wherever else.

4.) Literally your entire family goes here:
In case you forgot Michael, your brother and dad are both with the team. How many times are you going to be able to play alongside your father AND your brother? And if you stay long enough, who knows–you might be able to play with another brother or two.

3.) Brett Rau won’t be back:
Of course, playing time is always a concern for every player. Everybody wants to play. And with Brett Rau already playing 10 times as many minutes as Michael Porter this year, somebody will have to fill those minutes next year when Rau graduates. MPJ would possibly be asked to fill Rau’s role next year, but, of course, he would be fighting for minutes with junior/sharpshooter/G.O.A.T Adam Wolf for that role.

2.) We’ll change our name from the Tiger to the Porters:
Picture this: center court, a giant picture of your face, right at half court. Honestly, not too many teams are willing to go that far for you, but we’re sure Truman is willing to put ego aside if you promise another year at The Zou.

1.) Stay for the money:
On average, people with college degrees make about $18,000 a year more than people without college degrees. Michael Porter would be giving up a fair amount of money by dropping out of college after one year. Not only that, but “college dropout” would not look good on his resume when he’s interviewing with future employers.

Why do you want to go to the real world and become an adult so fast? These are supposed to be the best four years of your life! While we can’t promise you any playing time next year, everyone at Mizzou would greatly appreciate it if you could at least come back for just one more year Mr. Michael Porter.

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