It’s officially bracket season, which means March Madness is upon us. And for the first time in what seems like ages, Mizzou somehow found a way to make it into the tournament. No, not the NIT. Mizzou is in MARCH FUCKING MADNESS. So, to make the games a little more interesting than they already are, The Black Sheep have come up with a little drinking game to make the this March one to remember (or, if you play the game right, probably not).
5.) Take a shot when Jeremiah Tilmon gets a foul:
Nice way to start off the basketball game. Don’t worry, you shouldn’t have to wait more than two or three minutes into the game for this happen. It’s a miracle that you can only get five fouls a game, otherwise you might get alcohol poisoning from this part.
4.) Take a drink whenever you hear Michael Porter’s name mentioned:
With the sheer amount of times this actually happens in a game, we recommend no hard liquor for this part. The man has only played about 30 minutes all year but probably has the most camera time of any player in the damn conference. With him back and healthy, look for his mentions to be way up now.
3.) Take two pulls of whatever is near by whenever the announcer mentions Jontay Porter should be in high school:
In case you watch the games with the TV on mute, Jontay Porter actually reclassified to miss his senior year of high school to play with his brother and dad this year at Mizzou. You will hear that exact sentence everytime Jontay scores a basket because that’s the only thing any announcer knows about this guy.
2.) Finish whatever bottle is in your hand when they mention how tough Jordan Geist is…:
Same goes for if they mention “how much hustle he brings to the team.” Apparently the only two skills he has, according to every announcer, is his hustle and being a scrappy ball player.
1.) Every time Jordan Barnett scores, shotgun a beer:
Hopefully the man plays, because we really need him for the tourney. Who among us doesn’t have a DWI anyway? Sucks that this happened in what might be the last game of our season, especially since now Mizzou literally might only have like, six, players that can play now…
Well, now that you are probably shitfaced, hopefully Mizzou played well enough to advance and survive the next round. That means you get to play this game all over again, at least for one more time this year! Good luck.