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Mizzou’s Party Hardy Venn Diagram: Roxy’s vs My House

We all have our preferences for choice of bar of course, but when it comes to the “nightclub” with the best dance floor and drink specials, the only two left in CoMo to compete are Roxy’s vs My House. That’s why we’ve  done you a favor and compared them so you can reference them before your outing Thursday night. You’re welcome.

When we think of Roxy’s, there are much more memories to reminisce on. Like how gunshots can be fired and most just assume it’s the loud bass from the music. Or the time our friend snuck a JJ’s sandwich in his pants and security didn’t even notice. Even that time you saw the most sloshed girl ever trip up the steps.

The best part about Roxy’s though is Bottomless Thursday. If you’re feeling thirsty, they most certainly will have you covered (and if you’re not feelin’ it, just sneak into Piano). And no underpaid CoMo councilmen are going to take that glory away from us. Who cares if the bartender never cuts us off… that’s what Uber is for right?

But then there’s My House, the new wannabe Roxy’s but with a more chill outside hangout in the back. Where meeting celebrities in their prime like Ezekiel Elliot, before he beat his girlfriend, is more of a regular occurrence than a once in a lifetime opportunity. The drinks might not be as strong, but if you have enough while catching an NFL game outside in their lawn chairs, you still won’t remember it the next day. Just please for the love of Truman do not fall into one of their porta potties.

The real key is though, that while both seem to have shitty covers (only $5, but we’re all broke here), and are fairly generous in the ID card department (watch out for My House though), whichever you go, dancing like a complete and totally idiot is more than encouraged. So you dance your tails off Tigers andwhicheverr you choose, just remember, The Black Sheep is not responsible for your irresponsible-ness (so do not drink and drive) and choose wisely, on what bar to go to of course.

And if you just said fuck it and went to both, that’s no small feat. But if you took our diagram for serious, we hope your night was one to forget.

 

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