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‘I Can Never Make My 8 A.M,’ Says Student Who Will Wake Up Every Saturday Morning For 6 A.M. Tailgate

When it comes to those pesky 8 a.m. lectures, campus sophomore Esther Davis can’t make a single one of those classes. However, when it’s college football Saturday, she’ll be the first one in a bucket hat, bonging beers at a 6 a.m. tailgate.

“The only people who get up to do work at 8 a.m. are like millions of everyday Americans,” Davis said. “Despite class times throughout the week, I will get up for every single 6 a.m. tailgate because I feel no sense of time and responsibility when I drink. I’m going to live forever until graduation!”

A loud, startling shriek was later heard from Davis toward the end of the tailgate once the sober thought of the 11:59 p.m. deadline on her discussion post for her 8 a.m. class on Monday.

Listen to Talk of Shame, a podcast about being young & dumb, hosted by 2 drunk girls from The Black Sheep, Mackenzie & Andrea. One can’t find her tampon, the other one’s laundry is probably on fire. Subscribe to Talk of Shame:

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