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5 Things to Shit All Over This Finals Season at NYU

Sometimes you just put too much on your plate, and you gotta take a big ol’ poo. Here are a few spots to go ahead and shit upon when it all gets to be too much:

5.) Your appearance:
In this time of finals and overall apathy, sweatpants become your best friend and you somehow end up forgetting what your hair product looks like. You become much more interested with how many hours of sleep you’re not getting, and end up taking a classic shit on your appearance.

4.) Your romantic relationships:
With all the stress in your life, your beloved S.O. can sometimes get the nasty side of you. And that nasty side will just be you pooping right on that relationship of yours. Good thing it’s cuffing season, and people are all a little more forgiving!

3.) Your biology final:
Sometimes life happens, and you just don’t make enough time to study for that biology exam. You take one look at that test, and defecate all over it in the form of stupid, stupid answers. 

2.) Your future:
Of course, messing up your future is never intentional. But as college students exposed to drugs, alcohol, and Netflix – some responsibilities can get lost. Sometimes you gotta apologize to mom and dad, and take a lil poo right on that bright future you envisioned.

1.) 9th Floor of Steinhardt:
This is also a good place to excrete actual poop without a lot of people around.

With all these options, you will surely find some

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