It’s scheduling and midterm szn, which means that everyone and their mom is trying to see their academic advisor. Whether it’s because you’re failing a class, or you have no idea what to do with your schedule (and the rest of your life), you’ll have to wait until after winter break your senior year to see your advisor for help. So, here are some alternatives you could try while waiting for your appointment.
7.) Use a dartboard:
Can’t decide what to major in? Or don’t know what classes to sign up for next? No worries—just put some options up on a dartboard and let ‘er rip! Wherever it lands is what you should do! So what if you end up taking calculus, chemistry, and physics in the same semester? It’s probably better than anything your advisor could come up with. You’ll just hit up Thompson a little extra next semester and forget who your closest family and friends are.
6.) Study abroad:
If you’re not sure what to do with your life? Just move away from all your problems with study abroad! Take all the classes you don’t want to deal with in a foreign country, and that way you won’t have to deal with Ohio weather, stupid group projects and mandatory attendance policies. After you get back from your
vacation educational and eye-opening studies abroad, maybe you’ll actually have an idea of what to do for the rest of your life. After all, everyone who studies abroad says it’s “life changing,” even if they blew off all their classes for foreign booze.
5.) Join Honors for priority scheduling:
You were an honors student in high school—how much different can honors in college be? After all, it seems worth it for the great perks, like priority scheduling. Join the Honors Program without doing any research, and then reap those sweet, sweet benefits as you cry yourself to sleep because of Honors chemistry (that you have to take because Honors). At least you can take comfort in the fact that you get to schedule before anyone else.
4.) Ask an upperclassman:
Your roommate’s friend’s sister’s cousin is in the same program as you are, and they’re a senior this year, so why not ask them what to take for your schedule? After all, they buy you booze (when you beg them to), so they’ll probably be more than happy to help you out with your classes too. To pay them back, save up a few swipes for them to get into Scott.
3.) Just change your major:
Going into your freshman year declaring a double major biomedical engineering degree probably wasn’t the smartest thing you could have done, and now you’re failing three classes and your GPA is lower than Bullwinkle’s standards. Overcorrecting has never failed before, so declare your new major in medieval literature! Now you’ll have to take five years of college, but at least you’ll still be getting a degree (but maybe not a job).
2.) Bribe your advisor:
Bribing your advisor is not really illegal, but takes a lot of skill to accomplish. Try showing off your assets as a good student, or promise your advisor that they can come to your next party. Keep your demands small and work your way toward loftier demands. This way, they don’t reject you outright. Instead of asking to drop three classes from your transcript, ask to only drop one. You’re sure to finesse the pants off your adviser in no time.
1.) Steal someone’s appointment:
You’ve been using someone else’s ID to get into Midway for, like, a year now, so it can’t be that hard to take someone else’s appointment. Just walk up like you own the place and say you have an appointment, and the people working at the front desk will believe you. So what if you’re in Fisher and you’re talking to the Health Sciences advising? It’s all about confidence!
If these ways don’t help, you could always wait it out til your appointment, but you’ll probably have graduated by then anyway.
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