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The 8 Sexiest Oklahoma State Alumni

Oklahoma State University isn’t just known as being the brightest mofo orange out there, but also produces some good lookin’ famous alum. Take a look at the list and pick which one you would be caught in bed with.

James Marsden:

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This dark-haired, blue-eyed former Versace model, movie star honey can get it at any age. He might have only been at OSU for a year, but that could have something to do with his Wi-Fi-loving, Pokéstop braggin’ fraternity creeping him out…

Boone Pickens:

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He might be a little fluffy around the edges and a tad too wrinkly for your taste, but that bank account, though. Why not take a sugar daddy? You’re college broke and already fake an orgasm with your boy toy, so let Pickens’ money buy your happiness.

Kinga Philipps:

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The gorgeous Poland native is so successful and sexy that it almost makes you look past her attempted 7 other majors before graduating. Kinga has a passion for learning the lifestyle of people everywhere, but she hasn’t explored you yet.

Garth Brooks:

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This country music icon makes every girl want to be the bearer of his children because of, let’s be real, his fame. But, did you know while he was a bouncer at Tumbleweed, he broke up a girl fight in the lady’s room and married one of the chicks years later? Now that’s Oklahoma hick sexy.

Dez Bryant:

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He was promoted from OSU Cowboy to Dallas Cowboy because duh, look at that perfectly carved body. He can catch us any day Googling his shirtless pictures at Aspen Coffee.

Anita Hill:

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Being an intelligent  feminist is a quality praised by girls today. It’s the new sexy. However, frat daddies are notorious for going for the dependent, dumb blonde whose resume includes managing daddy’s money and knowing how to edit her face on Instagram. You go Anita, boys being intimated by you taking their job is sexy goals.

Stuart Roosa:

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A little ginger never killed nobody. Help the ginger population from going extinct and start getting with these firecrotches.

Gary Busey:

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He attempted to graduate with a journalism degree at OSU, and sometimes that makes you go batshit crazy. When he smiles that opened-mouth grin, we hope he is just recalling his time at OSU. He has a face only a mother could love, but everyone deserves some extra love other than family because this isn’t Alabama.

 

Being an OSU Alumni is the goal, but no one actually wants to graduate so we thought of two alternatives for you. First: don’t graduate and run away to L.A. in an attempt to become famous or be a hooker for the famous. Second: you do everything you can to be the next sugar daddy and rename a random building on campus to leave a minuscule legacy behind. Whatever road you go down, remember, Go Pokes!

It’s homecoming season, so get ready for some old dudes to buy you some beer.

 
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