One of the worst things you can experience in college is signing up for a class that you were dead certain was going to be easy, then realizing that that class has become the bane of your existence mid-term. Why didn’t you switch out of that class when you had the chance? If you see any combination of these things this upcoming week of classes get out.
5.) You had an exam on the first day:
This should be a huge red flag. If your professor has the balls to give you an exam on the first day, then what the hell do you think the rest of the class is going to be like? They’ll try and appease you with the promise of magical ~extra credit~. The professor forgot to mention that the test was designed to let you know that you are not ready for this class. He knows you’re gonna fail miserably, but he just won’t tell you.
4.) There’s online homework:
Who invented online homework? Was it Dick Cheney? It must have been. There’s no one else with the capacity of hatred of human life required to manifest such an evil creation. Online homework sounds great a first, it sounds like easy points. Anyone that’s had a math class or a foreign language class can tell you that online homework is brutal. What’s that you misspelled one word? Well guess what? You got the entire question wrong. And better yet you can only retry the question once. HA!
3.) Your instructor has an accent, and hey, you’re bad at those!:
Instructors with accents tend to get a bad rap, and the truth is they deserve it. When they moved to Oregon from southern California they should have practiced a little more, knowing well enough that you’d hardly be able to understand them sitting all the in the back of that lecture hall. And that friends, is a recipe for a GPA killing machine.
2.) The professor is mysteriously absent from RateMyProfessor.com:
RateMyProfessor is the most helpful resource a college student can possibly have. How many times has it saved us from imminent disaster? That is why it’s even more aggravating when you find that your professor is not listed with a scathing or complimentary review. It is very rare that this happens, but when it does do not be the fool. Do not take the chance.
1.) Your class is in Deady Hall:
Deady Hall is the oldest building on campus, and it’s also where GPAs go to die. That’s why if you squint hard enough it kind of looks like Edgar Allen Poe. For generations students foolish enough to take a class in Deady Hall have climbed its never ending staircases, passing its countless floors and mezzanines only to meet an untimely death at the hands of the demons which teach Calculus 1 and Discrete Mathematics on its top floor. It is said that if you have an 8 a.m. class there you can still hear their screams.
If you see any of these things during your first week of classes, be wary. At this point you should just switch to water aerobics.
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