Being at UO means being around a bunch of snobby-ass journalism students. If you have not gathered by now, they never fail to let you know all about it. Sure Oregon’s a top notch journalism school, but j-majors always feel the need to mention it at least a billion times in conversation.
“If you aren’t a j-major, you can’t sit with us,” is something we’ve all heard. The look of absolute disgust for whatever you’re doing with your own life is all over their faces. Sorry we care about people other than ourselves. J-majors are the Sharpay Evans of the entire UO population, always wanting more, always boo-hooing when they don’t get their way. Oh, cry us a river and then float down it, why don’t you?
If you’ve ever had a conversation with a j-rat, without, “What’s your major?” being asked then consider yourself lucky. From that moment on you will be wishing North Korea just went ahead and did it. Journalism students don’t understand that no one wants to talk about their accomplishments on whatever-the-fuck project they just did. Or how hard the j-school is…you went in knowing it was going to be this way, so shut up.
Ever been at a football game and have Beatrice and Gertrude talk about editing quizzes? Or been evacuating a fire and heard Becky complain (for the fucking millionth time) about how hard her package is? Or been at your grandma’s funeral and heard Brad talking about how much he kisses his J2100 professor’s ass? Don’t worry, natural selection has plans for them.
If you haven’t gathered by now, journalism majors are meh. They will lurk over your shoulder and nitpick your every move so it’s to their liking. They give you “endearing” but condescending advice. They put themselves on such high horses that they believe they’re untouchable and that your opinion is always wrong (or needs editing).
If you find yourself trapped in a conversation with a j-major, the best move is to say you have to shit really badly and run to the nearest bathroom and hide out until they leave. It’s a nice quiet place to rethink your wanting to come to Oregon. If you are a j-major, maybe tone down the self-centeredness so you can make friends who are outside of the journalism school. Or really any friends at all. And before you go saying The Black Sheep isn’t real journalism… (yes, we started this sentence with and).
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