It’s almost Halloweekend and you still don’t have a costume. While you can scramble to McClanahan’s or Metro and find something both slutty and cliché, The Black Sheep is here to hook you up with the best costumes in Happy Valley. You won’t regret walking down College in these Penn State-themed outfits.
7.) Grilled Sticky:
Be a State College staple by covering yourself in maple syrup and cinnamon. Sure, it might be uncomfortable, but it’s cheap and you spent all your money on Penn State crop tops and the HUB salad bar. You’ll feel sticky in that South Atherton basement no matter what, so you’re already one step ahead of everyone else. When your ass is stuck to the frat guy you’ve been grinding on all night, it’ll just be more intimate.
6.) Old Main Bells:
You don’t even have to dress up; just start yelling “DING-DONG, DING-DONG” every fifteen minutes, with extra dings for each hour. Your constant ringing will be the perfect way to let everyone know it’s shot o’clock.
5.) Willard Preacher:
All you need is a red sweatshirt, dad jeans, an endless supply of Christian values, and an appreciation for the sound of your own voice. If you’re really in the spirit, shame your friends for drinking Natty Light as you pace around the room in a circle, hands clasped behind your back.
You’ll need a Penn State sweatshirt and white dad sneakers. As you walk down Frat Row, be sure to call everyone “son,” and take up the entire sidewalk while moving at a pace slower than Classic Mode LionPATH.
3.) CATA Bus:
All you need to do is label a cardboard box with the “CATA” logo and put an advertisement on the side for The Retreat or some other apartment complex that’s entirely too expensive for being so far away from campus. You’ll be the life of the party as you beep behind slow walkers and sing down College Ave. Your friends will love spending the night with the human version of the Whoop.
2.) The Duck Drink:
Become a Pman’s favorite by dressing in blue and pink with a rubber duck atop your head. You’ll inevitably lose the duck, along with your Penn State I.D. and PNC card. The next morning, some kind soul will search for you by posting on every Penn State Facebook page that they’ve found these items outside of D.P. Dough the night before.
1.) Lion Ambassador:
Find yourself a blue windbreaker and walk backwards to Frat Row. On your way, be sure to point out all of your favorite Downtown State College landmarks, like the bush you drunkenly peed in freshman year and the bench you puked on immediately after.
Now go brag about your costume to everyone in the HUB and pretend you didn’t have to steal the idea from the Internet.