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Amazing! Penn State Student Still Smiling at Week 15

While many Penn State students are tearing up in line at Indigo and starting fights over the best seats in Pattee, senior Ethan Williams has been found smiling from ear to ear all over campus. “I’m actually doing really well right now,” Williams said without a hint of sarcasm.

Williams’ cheerful appearance was first spotted crossing Pattee Mall on his way to an 8 a.m. calculus class in Willard. As the Willard Preacher prepared for another day of incessantly talking, he spotted Williams and remarked, “That boy has either seen the light of the Lord or he’s still drunk on that evil Natty Light.”

Later that day, Williams was seen smiling yet again as he walked through Pollock Testing Center’s check-in line. Sophomore Jessica Lyon couldn’t believe her eyes. “Honestly, it’s rude. Getting into The Testing Center is worse than airport security. That guy should have been just as miserable as the rest of us.”

Ethan Williams even had the audacity to smile in the HUB Starbucks line. HUB Dining worker Leah Selzer recounted the shocking scene. “It was the middle of the day, so the line wrapped around all the way to Panda. Legit, this dude was smiling for the entire hour that he waited for his coffee. He didn’t even crack when his order was wrong. It was amazing.”

What makes Williams so happy while the rest of Penn State feels the urge to jump off Mount Nittany? “I late-dropped two of my classes and only have one final,” Williams explained.

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