There’s a fine line between Jingle Bells and Little Drummer Boy. You can’t just find someone singing “Baby its Cold Outside” without being told its sexist. Plus, the more egg nog liquor you use, the words get all slurred anyway. Somewhere between your grandma’s sweater and the mistletoe that crazy girl/guy has been leashed to all night, you gotta start singing. The Black Sheep has thought long and hard and checked our playlist twice to make your holidays merry and twice as meme.
5.) In the End – Linkin Park:
You wanna show your folks how hard it was to get home from Pitt for break? You wanna seem super edgy after your Russian Fairytales final? Are you just full of angst after the 10A passed you? Play this song and it is guaranteed the holiday spirit will be with you.
4.) Little Drummer Boy – Skrillex:
Of course you want little drummer boy to drop the base on you under the tree. You didn’t want some kid with half a head of hair to make this already questionable song worse? Too bad, you’re about to get wild. And just wait until he gets to the barumpapumpum.
3.) You’re a Mean One Mr. Trump – Some Homeless Hippie on Forbes:
Everyone is supposed to love everybody at Christmas. Unless you are Trump or not progressively minded. Then you can go eat pine needles. So sing along with this random guy on Forbes who made this song into half song, half slam poetry.
2) Mary Did You Know? – Lorde:
Enjoy this really serious song made even weirder by Lorde’s movements and weird lipstick. As she jerks around your head you will start wondering if you should have used that one strip of lights outside your house that made sparks so it burned down. And at the end she just starts convulsing and grunting and calling it “art.”
1) Ju-Ju on That Beat – Alvin and the Chipmunks:
Now you can juju but don’t have to listen to the low bass, just some annoying chipmunks. Their hair is lookin messy and your ears are looking like they’re about to burst. People will love this classic group singing to your half-right half-wrong dance moves.
So however you get down, be sure to meme for at least one song. Plus each of these songs are better than anything Michael Buble can produce, because we all know high male voices are not the new Bing Crosby. Happy Holidays from The Black Sheep!