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Out-of-Touch USC Students Struggle to Make Sense of Cockstock Lineup

Following the announcement that the Cockstock 2016 headliner would be Atlanta-based hip-hop duo Rae Sremmurd, several out-of-touch USC students expressed confusion as to who the duo is, and what that could possibly mean for their Homecoming experience.

“What the hell is a Sremmurd and what is it doing on campus?” asked bewildered accounting major, Sam Thurmond.

“At first I was really excited about Cockstock, but then I realized I had no idea who these Rae Sremmurd people are, and that meant I would probably be standing awkwardly, bopping my head off-beat, and shouting the most repetitive chorus line I can remember in order to fake engagement with songs I’ll be hearing for the first time,” said dismayed student Samantha Heller.

When informed that the hip-hop duo is responsible for several songs that were among the top 10 in many US R&B and Rap charts, many of these out-of-touch students fired back, insisting that they’ve never heard a Rae Sremmurd song in their lives.

Playing short samples from top hits such as, “No Flex Zone” and “No Type” appeared to trigger recognition, as several students perked up, saying, “Wait, are you telling me this isn’t Bobby Shmurda?”

Just like the leaves on trees or the srat stars’ skin, coffee in Starbucks cups nation wide is turning orange this month?

 

 

 

 
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