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The Top 5 Nonsexual Things at Syracuse That Turn Us On

It’s no lie that Syracuse University is one of the most sexual looking campuses to ever exist. But with that, it also has several nonsexual things about it that still manage to light our fires. It’s not easy going to a school as arousing as SU, and The Black Sheep compiled a list to further solidify our attractions.

5.) Hendrick’s Chapel:
Nothing says “talk dirty to me” quite like a place of worship for each and every religion. Hendrick’s Chapel is the building equivalent of those moms that drive around in their 2013 Dodge Grand Caravan with the hastily plastered “COEXIST” bumper stickers on the back. Mmm, coexist, baby, coexist.

4.) People’s Place:
Hidden beneath the depths of HC (hip lingo for Hendrick’s Chapel), People’s Place is begging customers to seek it out when they need it most (kind of like your ex-boyfriend texting whenever he starts shotgunning beers). Nothing is more arousing than the hunt for coffee, and People’s Place delivers.

3.) This statue:
His balls are literally out. Who is this guy, anyway?

2.) Abraham Lincoln:
Abe “The Babe” Lincoln has that special aura about him that really keeps most students up at night. First of all, we all love a man with shiny, metallic skin. Most noteworthy: that chiseled jawline. Better yet, you know what they say about big feet! And huge arms, and long legs, and a stature of probably 17 feet and…

1.) The Orange Grove:
Money talks, and that must be why The Orange Grove keeps whispering sweet nothings into the ears of SU students all around. Students constantly find themselves being turned on by the sheer amount of wealth needed to afford a brick in the O-Grove. How sexy it must be to spend $1,000 to get your name on a brick while we have to debate whether or not we can afford dinner tonight!

It’s not easy having to constantly be on edge when it comes to inadvertently getting your fancies tickled by the campus scenery. But that’s the price we pay ($60,000 x 4) to never have to worry about taking the little blue pill.

 

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