“Be careful up there, it’s very cold,” says everyone. “Enjoy the weather!” says your toad of an uncle. “Where is my $500,” asks your neighbor. All the usual stuff! But everyone seems to forget about the brief few weeks where Syracuse University enters Satan’s lair. Everyone told you this place was cold, but here are the best places to get the best ASMR sensations and beat the heat in Syracuse.
5.) The Women’s Building gym:
Oh, wait. Off to a bad start…They keep shutting her down because it’s a glorified heat-filled sauna. But if you’re into that kind of thing moving down your spine, making you feel out-of-this-world, then more power to you.
4.) The bottom floor of Newhouse:
Nothing is quite as chilly as the heart of a crazed BDJ major. They crawl all up and down the bottom floor of Newhouse. Your best bet is to check out the cage, where you’ll find them complaining about having to set up a camera and talk to it. Mmmm, you can feel your scalp tingling already…
3.) The Schine Dining salad section:
It’s never quite as cold as you want it to be, which makes it the perfect temperature to just lay your body down on it. Oh, just think of dipping your toes into the hardboiled eggs for the ultimate chilling sensation…
Once people enter there, they never come out. It’s probably very chilly in there! Great place to seek out a cooling shelter and bump into a lot of sad people. Just thinking about seeing their poor sad bodies move around just gives you the ultimate relaxing feeling.
1.) Ernie Davis:
Go hang with the rich folk of Syracuse University! Everyone knows only the wealthy and elite of SU can live in Ernie where there is air conditioning. Gone are the days where they can “ha ha” your poor ass from afar, because you’ll be sleeping in the Ernie bathrooms! Money and A/C are worldly possessions, but that doesn’t mean they can’t stimulate your central nervous system to stave off the heat…
In an era where people are “forgetting what it feels like to be cold,” go seek refuge from this heat, get your ASMR on, and remember for yourself what that feeling is…until November, when we crave the caress of the dark lord.
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