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Field Report: PCB TV Recipes

If you’ve ventured into the hallowed area known as the PCB cafeteria, you’ve seen these videos. They are there, proudly displayed, right next to the monitor that plays the “Whistle While You Work It” music video ad nauseam. We are, of course, referring to the LEAF.tv channel.

 

At first glance, these videos seem nothing but professional. Soft light, pleasant music, oak tables; these are all hallmarks of a LEAF.tv instructional video. But with such sleek production design, it’s easy to forget that these videos are the filmic equivalent of your crazy aunt’s homeopathic remedies. When you look past the surface of these fun DIY videos, something else entirely appears. We here at The Black Sheep tried several of these recipes, so you don’t have to.

 

Please, don’t try these at home.

 

PCB UTK pic 1

 

Oil Pulling:

We begin our sojourn into the world of LEAF.tv’s pinterest-y videos with what is claimed to be an ancient method of healing. As the video stipulated, we spent 20 minutes, 20 valuable minutes which will never be replaced, swishing sesame oil around our mouths. Frankly, the process was disgusting, the sesame oil leaving a terrible taste in the mouth. The video claims that, if you swish the oil around in your mouth once a day for 20 minutes, your teeth will be strengthened and your gums whitened (or is it the other way around?) We cannot speak to the long-term effects of such a routine, but be warned that the only immediate effect of this “ancient art” is the desire to brush the taste of used fry grease out of the mouth.

 

 

Crispy Smashed Potatoes:

To purge our mouths of “oil pulling” we settled on a recipe that would actually generate food. As the video explained, we boiled several potatoes, then smashed these self-same potatoes with the back of a measuring cup (the video was oddly specific about using a measuring cup) before drizzling the flattened potatoes with oil and baking them. The potato crisps in the video looked flat, and honestly crispy. We were unable to replicate these result. Despite the actions of The Black Sheep’s top chef, our “crispy smashed potatoes” came out chunky and mushy. Instead of Crispy Smashed Potatoes, we had produced Soggy Chunked Potatoes. They were kind of like soggy French fries, expect these soggy French fries took almost an hour to make. They weren’t terrible, don’t get us wrong, but these Crispy Smashed Potatoes were not worth the trouble.

 

PCB UTK pic 3

 

Dry Shampoo:

Our last recipe was, surprisingly, the most successful. The recipe was simple and the DIY video was clear: combine baking soda, cocoa powder and corn starch in a shaker and apply to the head. And it worked. Our hair could not be matched. Just as regular, wet shampoo would, our hair stayed stylish and luscious all day. The only drawback, in fact, is the fact that you look like an insane person. Seriously, who wants to talk to the student emptying a salt-shaker full of homemade shampoo on their head as they fast-walk across Ped Walkway to get to English class? No one, that’s who. But, in those desperate circumstances where you just can’t wait for your stupid roommate to get out of the shower, or you want to do the exact opposite of impressing someone, this DIY Dry Shampoo will get the job done.

 

And yet, this PCB TV program is more educational than most freshman-year classes here.

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