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Top 10 Reasons Why Vols Are Excited for Thanksgiving

 

Once again, Turkey Day is right around the corner. Everyone knows that once you get past Thanksgiving you’re basically in the clear, except for finals, but that’s a discussion for another time and place. The Black Sheep has all the reasons we’re excited for Thanksgiving Break.

 

10.) The 4-Day Weekend:

Yeah, yeah we know we should be excited about going home, spending time with family, and being thankful, but our eyes are on the real prize: a 4-day weekend. There’s nothing better in the eyes of a Vol than a nice, long weekend of relaxation and endless amounts of food. Bring on the stuffing, the turkey, and all the pie we can get our hands on, and maybe cranberry sauce if you’re one of those people.

 

9.) The Food:

Realistically, in terms of America, Thanksgiving is only about the food. All kinds of food at all hours of the day.  Especially if you’re trapped with family in a remote area and all there is to do is eat and eat and eat. Now, we aren’t mad about this because food is glorious, especially all of that Thanksgiving comfort food. Did someone say honey-baked ham?

 

8.) Seeing Your Pets:

This may not be true for everyone… who are we kidding, who doesn’t love getting to see their pets!? For most freshmen Thanksgiving is the first time some of them return home since the very beginning of the semester. And it’s always nice to return home to a big slobber kiss from your four-legged pals.

 

7.) Quality Liquor:

For the first time in months you will be able to enjoy wine, beer, and spirits that aren’t $12 or cheaper. You know your parents got that nice ish, unless they’re cheap about alcohol too. In that case, good luck bud. But most parents’ old stomachs/livers can’t handle the cheap shit anymore so the liquor cabinet is ripe for the picking. Cheers!

 

6.) Christmas is Around the Corner:

This is especially important because by the time you’re in college, you’re actually all about getting new clothes and other useful things for Christmas. And it’s getting closer as Thanksgiving expires. Bring on the free stuff, fam.

 

5.) Starbucks Winter Flavors:

Goodbye Pumpkin Spice Latte and hello Peppermint Mocha! The onset of late November brings the delicious winter-flavored coffee drinks that Starbucks has to offer. And who doesn’t like fun-flavored coffee? There’s gingerbread lattes, eggnog lattes, chestnut praline lattes, and probably many more obscure flavorings. If you don’t like it, GTFO, Scrooge.

 

4.) Seeing Your Parents:

Are you really excited to see your parents? Yeah, kinda, but maybe not really. All they do is nag your about grades, possible love interests, and how you’re eating because they can tell you got fat, among a million other things. And who knows; you’ll probably need to ask them for money, so yeah get excited to see them.

 

3.) What’s on TV:

From the Dallas Cowboys being their usual Thanksgiving Day attention-whore selves to the Detroit Lions once again garnering the collective sympathy of Americans everywhere, there’s plenty of football, if you’re into that. If not, there’s a plethora of other things on TV. Like incredibly historically-accurate John Wayne Thanksgiving movies for the grandparents or political specials for your Rush Limbaugh-obsessed uncle whose wife is on “vacation.”

 

2.) Not Checking Blackboard for Four Days:

It’s great to not have to scour any syllabi out of extreme paranoia over your grades and/or assignments. On a related note, if you’re a teacher and you update the hell out of your classes’ Blackboard pages during break, you are detrimental to society. However, seeing the try-hard freshman with push-to-touch notifications from the Blackboard app freak out at the dinner table is pretty fun.

 

1.) Black Friday:

If you’re a girl that likes to shop or somebody with a significant other, you need to go buy presents. If you’re a broke college student you need to go buy things for dirt cheap. If you’re a bored person with no Netflix subscription you need something crazy to watch. Black Friday shopping kills all of these birds with one stone. Try not to get trampled, chumps.

 

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