With midterms finally and thankfully coming to a close, just in time to head into finals, The Black Sheep has learned and tested techniques to help get through these tough times. We realize it probably would’ve been helpful to have this guide before midterms; we never do things right. We also may or may not have been too drunk the last few weeks.
5.) Go on a scenic drive:
While driving around Riverside, you will notice a lot of dirt, trash, and possibly a dead body (if you’re lucky) in the Walmart parking lot (you know the one – by Sterling). It may not be visually appealing, but it will distract you and make you realize things could be worse. If you want a pleasant drive, with NO dirt and a bunch of mansions, that makes you wish you’d never majored in philosophy, drive down Arlington.
UCR may not be known for being the most prestigious in academics, or the most talented in athletics, but there is one thing everyone is proud of: the gym. The newly renovated SRC has a way of guilting you into working out – especially when you considered that you’re forced to pay the membership fees, anyway. Somehow, during midterms the gym isn’t so horrendous. Is it that working out is better than studying? Or you’re working through your anger at your professor, your TA, and yourself? With the upcoming heatwave, you’ll also be spending lots of time in that pool.
If you feel like being in an environment that doesn’t remind you of the sh*thole that are your grades, take a trip to ProAbition in Downtown Riverside. The drinks are more expensive, but you have to treat yo self after midterms, even if you failed, because at least you took it! And really, is there a price limit on a drunk time? (Yes, because we’re college students. Get someone to buy drinks for you.)
2.) Meeting up with your Tinder match:
A CNASS major, after bragging about being a CNASS midterm, told us that the release of oxytocin can act as a sedative, and a meeting with your Tinder match can help release oxytocin, if you catch our drift, wink wink. (Sex. Sex with your Tinder match will release oxytocin.)
1.) A trip to “Narnia”:
Who doesn’t love gardening? And then you get to enjoy the greens you gardened (is that a verb?)! Don’t get caught by UCPD, and you’re golden. You’re also considerably more relaxed. It is also recommended to visit “Narnia”, the hidden grassy patch between A and B sides of Lothian, right before your grades are posted, if you can. It has been proven by some scientist somewhere, and by countless UCR students, that you probably won’t be as upset if you see your grades after a visit to Narnia.