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5 Essentials To Ensure a Successful St. Patty’s Day Rager in IV

While the residents of Isla Vista don’t usually require a reason to party, the presence of an opportunity to party without shame is always appreciated. March 17th marks one of the iconic party holidays that is celebrated here in the US. Trumped only by New Years and the Fourth of July, St. Patrick’s Day is a perfect excuse to drink whiskey, beer and whatever vodka Ireland kept after the potato famine. But since most of us will be crotch-deep in pre-finals hell next weekend, we decided to get ahead of the curve with these five things that will help ensure the success of the ultimate Irish rager in IV:

5.) Kidnap a leprechaun (slash short person):
The iconic staple of St. Patty’s Day is alcohol and leprechauns, so what could possibly go wrong by mixing the two? By bringing a leprechaun to the party, you can provide entertainment and holiday spirit. Since leprechauns can be hard to find, kidnapping a nearby short person will likely be easier. The beauty of drunk people is that they won’t even know the difference.

4.) Sexy leprechaun costume:
At some point in life, everyone fantasizes about encountering a slutty leprechaun, whether they’ll admit it or not. Maybe it’s the orange hair, the mystery, or maybe it’s the money, but something about boinking a leprechaun it is exciting. This costume allows that fantasy to come to life at any IV rager. A tasteful touch of orange chest hair on your cleavage will really get the juices flowing with whatever Irish wanker you’re trying to seduce.

3.) Weed-infused green food coloring:
Green is the color of St. Patty’s Day so green food coloring is a must, but it’s time to spice things up. Rather than your standard coloring, weed-infused food coloring makes getting stoned while maintaining the holiday spirit easy. Having to choose between getting high and celebrating the holiday that we all love is a culture of the past.

2.) Form the IRA (Intoxicated Residential Assistants):
Everyone knows the infamous IRA that used to terrorize Ireland, but with the positive spirit of the holidays in mind, form a new gang of mischiefs. RAs are always working, having to patrol the residence halls, so they need let loose and have some fun.  By joining the IRA, they can let loose and get drunk in a rule-free environment. It’s bsically Ireland!

1.) Irish Car Bombs:
This famous mixed drink has been popular for years now, but as IV likes to do, we have to add our own twist to this classic.  In this fun, high stakes drinking game, each player has a glass of Guiness, and they pour a shot of nitroglycerin into it and start chugging. The last one to finish bursts into a fiery explosion – what a fun way to elevate everyone’s heart rates and BACs!

With St. Patrick’s Day around the corner, it’s never too early to start prepping your holiday plans. Try some of these helpful holiday tips and you’ll be sure to maximize your St. Patty’s Day drinking potential.


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