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Can We All Agree Communications is The Worst Major at UConn?

 

Communications is like the cocaine of UConn majors: You had no idea that so many people were doing it, wasting so much money on it, and it’s also very white.

 

It’s like the COMM department either decided that Arjona was the building that correctly lined up with their aura or were just picked last like in gym class. But COMM majors are used to that.

 

Have you ever been to a COMM class? Most of them are either learning about the same nine theories you learned in the other nine COMM classes you took or it’s you having to participate in a study just to earn credit. Apparently they don’t know anyone else to ask besides their students and they can’t afford to pay people anymore. But hey, you should watch that episode of Friends and answer a survey about it. That’s what you went to college to be graded on.

 

Have you ever met a COMM Major who didn’t have tons of free time? That’s because it’s the easiest to make all of your classes on two days a week and then spend a grand total of maybe two hours a week doing busy work and making sure to bring your iClicker to class. Nevertheless COMM majors are definitely the most likely to say that they’re “so busy” while they’re on their five day weekend.

 

The one exception to the Tuesday and Thursday class rule is the insufferable MWF 3000Q Research Methods class every COMM major is forced to take. Most likely this will happen in their last semester because they get used to having Fridays to nurse Nickel night hangovers and going hard on a bacon, egg, and cheese croissant from Dunkin’ and telling mom it was a “hard week.”

 

They hem and haw at the high school level statistics they’re forced to do, because they haven’t seen numbers since then, and so the poor TA is forced to crack out the M&M’s and explain it like they’re Michael Scott.

 

When the COMM major inevitably graduates after 10 semesters (along with a minor in film studies and puppetry cause why not and because of the ambiguity of their job prospects), you can be sure they’re going to spend another 10 years trying to become a “doctor.” If you ever get bored go to the second floor of Arjona, pretend to have a heart attack and yell “is anyone here a doctor?!” and watch them all start talking about their PhDs and congratulate each other.

 

All in all, it can only be said that if COMM seems like what you want to major in, it’s probably not. And if COMM is what you majored in and it’s too late to turn back, do yourself a favor and grab one of those Social Media Marketing Analyst Assistant jobs at Aetna before the older generation learns how to use Facebook.

 

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