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The 5 Best Places to Drop if UMass was the Fortnite Map

Fortnite has completely taken over the nightlife scene here at UMass Amherst and people are returning back to their pre-pubescent gaming ways. Kids are downing Red Bulls and staying up through the dead of night just to get a ‘W’ to post on their Snap Story. In these 5 spots, you could win in real life Fortnite, and we’re pretty sure that’s all that really matters.

5.) W.E.B. DuBois Library:
Kind of obvious, yes, but the library provides a height advantage that nowhere else on campus can really rival. Not too many other spots in the country either. Chillin’ on top of the library would put you in an advantageous position to plan your attack, then watch all your compadres die in cold blood. Be sure to use a suppressor on your gun; this is a library after all.

4.) Sylvan Residential Area:
This is for one who enjoys playing a stealthy game. Yeah, yeah, Sylvan’s far away, we get it. The jokes have been made. However, We’re out here doing our civic duty and Sylvan would be a strong place to land. You could rummage through rich transfer’s dorms for loot and head off to battle. That being said, we recommend avoiding Northeast on the way to the war zone, those kids game.

3.) The ISB:
Full disclosure everyone, we don’t know too many people who have actually been inside this building. Despite that, we know this would be a healthy place to drop. Just walking by, you can tell some shit goes down in there. They have all sorts of lab equipment, all sorts of weapons for the taking. In our little game here, few locations would be better than the ISB. Actually, only 2 locations!

2.) Hampshire Dining Commons:
Hamp will certainly be a popular spot as one of the more commonly attended dining halls, but it will have some goodies ripe for the taking. Hamp, in its health initiative, doesn’t have sugary drinks. You know what they do have? Potions, all sorts of potions. All the failed drinks they couldn’t serve to students are stashed away somewhere at Hamp. Drink em’ all and see what happens to you. We’re being genuine when we say the opportunities are endless.

1.) Chancellor Kumble Subbaswamy’s house:
You’d have to be a fool to not consider this place. There’s literally no chance Subbaswamy doesn’t have any chests in his house. The man exudes treasure, just look at him! Now, look at the map and get to this house. Literally nothing could go wrong.

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