As classes wind down and students check out, 60% of the foot traffic on campus becomes people taking graduation photos. We’ve seen tens of hundreds of poses, so we thought we’d recreate some of them. In lieu of a graduation robe we used a trash bag, which has basically the same effect.
5.) The Patented Over the Shoulder “I’m Dying Behind This Smile” Pose:
Grab your graduation gown and hoist it over your shoulders like you’re physically carrying the crippling debt that college has given you.
4. The “Help Me the Photographer is Actually My Kidnapper” Look:
Hold your gown up and smile through the pain of taking a picture in such a public place. Not even Adobe Photoshop can remove the lifelessness behind your eyes.
3.) The Classic Sign Picture:
Yes, it’s uncomfortable to be on display for the entirety of University City Boulevard, but you knew your mom was going to make you get this picture before you leave. Fucking Janet.
2.) The “Are We Almost Done?” by the Stream Pose:
Sit on the river of life, also known as the stream that they installed on campus last year. It’s artificial, just like your hopes and dreams after graduation.
1. The “Thank God This is Over” Genuine Smile Look:
Your time taking photos is almost up, so why not grab one more by the pond on campus? If you’re lucky, a goose will come bite you in the ass and you can sue the school for bodily harm since geese are basically staff members here.
Sincerely we hope you enjoyed your time here at Niner Nation and congratulate you on graduation. Make sure to come visit while you’re still living at home and pass by on your commute to “work” at the bar.
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