The Black Sheep took to UNCC’s campus to ask eight (definitely real) students about current campus issues. Check out the remarkable responses we received!
TBS: What do you think about the appointment of Margaret Spellings as the new UNC System president?
– Ashley Mays, senior
TBS: The Holi Moli festival at UNCC was last Saturday! With water and colored powder flying everywhere and covering everyone, it was a spectacular, bright and colorful event to welcome in the Spring season. Were you able to attend?
“Aw, man… No, I didn’t get to go. I wish I had known about it. I love being sprayed with various substances.”
– Wesley Forrest, freshman
TBS: How do you feel about the Belk quad area being completely empty and barren? Does it leave a void in the pit of your stomach? Do you feel life is still worth living?
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“What? We’re in the middle of a lecture. Why are you asking all of these weird questions?! I’m gonna get kicked out and that’ll count as an absence. I already have 3 and once you hit 4, you fail the class. So, please, leave me alone.”
– Kylie Redder, junior
TBS: EXPLORE Open House was this weekend and you finally got a good look at UNCC!! What do you think?
*uncomfortably long silence*
– (from left to right) Chelsea Johnson, Richard Miller, Jessica Wilbanks, Greg Broham, Laura Scott – all upcoming freshmen.
TBS: Rent-A-Puppy days are coming up!! Are you excited to play with those fluff balls for 5 bucks?
“UNCC is using vulnerable, innocent puppies to suck out the last few cents we have to our name. They feed us with lies of great dining food, reliable wifi, enlightening classes, and a social environment. Instead, we have to pay 5 dollars out of our hard earned cash to play with a baby dog for 30 minutes. Capitalism is destroying this country. I have to PAY to PLAY?! That’s bullshit…. But, yeah, I’m going to Rent-A-Puppy.”
– Evan Grier, sophomore
TBS: The last day to withdraw is today! How are feeling about your classes?
“Life is meaningless and I’m dead inside.”
– Hayley Morris, junior
TBS: Spring and warmer weather usually means that the geese on campus have their little goslings following them around. How are you gonna be careful as to not upset the almighty goose mother?
“I mean, I guess I’ll just avoid their nesting areas, like around CHHS and the pond by South Village. Okay, but speaking of those little baby geese following their mother around…. Do see those three people behind me? They’ve been following ME around all day. I don’t know who they are and I’m honestly really scared right now. Can you call the police? Please, God. I just want to go back to my dorm but I don’t want them to know where I live.”
– Justin Gardner, freshman
TBS: The new Light Rail at UNCC is expected to be completed by next year! What do you think of this exciting new way for students to travel to and from campus?
“Don’t expect it to be done by 2017, because I’m going to the construction site tonight and consuming everything they have built so far. This will make me stronger. By dawn, there will be no construction on campus. I will have eaten all. My mother used to tell me that I am a monster, but she is wrong. I am a God. Leave me now. I have much to prepare.”
– Mikaila Mull, super senior
Want to weigh in on these issues? Let us know at @BlackSheep_UNCC! And if you can attach a picture of you smiling and giving a thumbs up, that’d be even better.