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Hey, Um, What The F**k Is The 69 Cartwheel Statue All About?

Anyone who has bothered to set foot on Western’s campus will never forget the sight of the iconic and erotic statue known as “The Committee,” which displays quite a bit of public affection right outside of Wood Hall. It is a rather odd work of art but also a unique and abstract reflection of life at THE Western Michigan University. Ever wanted to know the the truth about what the 69 cartwheel state truly means? Look no further. 

4.)  Each man represents a different drunk pose that wall strike: 

If you take a glance at each individual within the sculpture, you’ll find that there has definitely been a time where you raced through a case of Hamms in Valley 3 and appeared to look just as unstable and uncoordinated as the men in the sculpture are. It serves as a mirror for those that clearly don’t remember what sort of ignorant shit they went through and which pose they struck. And, honestly, those dudes are probably in better shape than you. 

3.)  It represents the Bronco buddy system: 

When going out and getting shitfaced at the Goat or FIJI, it is important to always use the buddy system and make sure that the squad you arrive with is the squad you leave with. Unless you’re shacking or you’re the unlucky bastard when there’s no room in the Drive Safe Kalamazoo vehicle. The sculpture is there to remind us all that of herd of Broncos is meant to rally together as one. It acts as a daily reminder to never lose track of a Bronco and to always have their backs–especially when they’re beating the shit out of a tribe of Chips or even when a bartender at Y Bar cuts them off on 50-cent beer nights. 

2.)  Iexplicitly depicts how kinky Broncos are: 

The hookup culture and amount of horny shenanigans involved at Western is at an all-time high. Western is essentially full of horn dogs and the statue was entirely inspired by the raw sluttyness of the students that populate the aroused campus. The reason for this being so is because it is hard for students to not get turned on whenever they pass by the sculpture on the way to class. By the time Broncos get to class after having the image of asses-to-mouths and wonky body handling, they can’t help but feel antsy in the lecture halls as they desperately await finding their potential bang buddy later at Wild Bull.  

1.)  It just shows how damn rowdy WMU is: 

Students think that the statue represents teamwork or the strength among physical unity, but any liberal arts student can vaguely describe it as such. It really showcases Western’s ability to embrace it’s weirdness, whacky bodily actions, and bizarre decision-making that Broncos love to wrap themselves around from time to time. Every aspect about it pertains to the ridiculousness and most headass moves that Western makes. 

For those uncultured swine that think the statue is weird, you’re fucking weird. The statue is one of the best representations of Western’s culture ever created! Take two minutes out of your day to soak in its brilliance and appreciate every little kinky detail about that magnificent Western achievement! 

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