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5 Ways to Satisfy Your Lover at WMU for Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is soon to arrive and at Western, people put in more effort than those God-awful CIS projects. It is often a tough battle to pick a location to fully satisfy your Bronco lover on the one day that love is heavily exaggerated. Fortunately, The Black Sheep has some ideas that are sure to not only get you laid, but also make for quite a fulfilling WMU Valentine’s Day experience.  Here are five ways to satisfy your Valentine’s Day lover right here at WMU. 

5.) Stuff your lover full….at the Valley Dining Center: 
Nothing says “Happy Valentine’s Day” like a romantic meal at the good ‘ol Valley Dining Center, especially since your broke ass can’t afford Rustica. With the numerous options available at the VDC, from subpar sandwiches to cheaply made burrito bowls, this is the best place to really stuff your love down your significant other’s throat. The setting and layout provides the perfect environment to show your valentine who her best Bronco is! 

4.) Get hot and saucey….at Two Fellas: 
The amount of meat and personal dressing you can provide to your Valentine is incomparable to the amount that you can acquire together at one of the happiest places on campus! At either the Two Fellas location on Howard or Drake, you are able to fully bond over the wonderful creations of delicious wraps that are purely made with love. When your parents tell you to “wrap it up” they just mean head over to Two Fellas and keep your sour cream in your own wrap. 

3.) Make her shout….at the echoey center of the Flagpoles: 
Everyone loves that one small spot in between all the flagpoles where the sound of your annoying ass voice bounces back at you, which would be an excellent spot to make your lover scream and shout for you! The compliments sound far more rewarding since they echo and repeat for all to hear. Make sure you’re capable of making her get loud and proud. But, since you’ll probably be alone on Valentine’s Day, you can totally just scream your own name and it’ll bounce right back to you without a problem! 

2.) Cover your bed with roses…. with the Rose Guy: 
Usually Broncos try to avoid the guy that sells expensive roses at those bars we all know and love. However, Valentine’s Day is where he is on his A-game and goes above and beyond his career as the ultimate rose distributor. Now we don’t know if he does this, but invite him over to your place and, for a suitable fee, he might help cover your bed and lady with roses to set the right tone and create a wonderful night for the two of you! Plus, what’s more romantic than roses? A three-way with the sexy guy who sells them to you! 

1.) Propose… as a trick to get free drinks at the bars downtown: 
This tactic is so foolproof that you can probably taste those free shots already! Take your lady Bronco to one of the classic bars downtown like Hopcat of Bell’s, get up on those wooden tables, and let the whole brewery know of your genius plan to take on commitment. Everyone’s drunk ass will be so happy for you and order you a whole line of drinks and immeasurable happiness! 

Valentine’s Day is the wonderful opportunity to show your smokeshow a good time, and WMU is the right place for just about anything! Show your valentine who her Bronco is, and get ready to giddy up! 

 

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